influenced by alcohol i started talking to ppl via facebook i poured my heart out about how shit i was/am feeling. i want to kill myself but it's so hard to even cut myself...i don't like me...i fucking hate me to be honest...doctors are fucking useless,family's even worse. i very rarely drink but when i do its the only time feel human...and humiliate myself by typing all sorts...i need to die so much but i'm so scared,i just wanna feel ok but i fucking cant,i slap myself everyday